The Infinite Flower of the Soul

Over the past years I have noticed the effects of constellations on myself in many ways, but my favorite of all is that I can laugh out loud, at the top of my lungs, even in the most embarrassing situations, without giving a fuck about anyone around me. Most people shit on others by putting their phone on speaker - I do the same with my loud laughter.

And when something really irritates me in my outer or inner world, more and more often I let it be and instead set out to look for the healing, releasing sentence. This is thanks to the awakening waves flowing out of the healing world of Edó and Wilfried. I wait until my own healing sentence appears. So that it may be better for me - the rest I leave to whoever it belongs to.

Every healing sentence that I say together with a client, I also say it for myself. For some part of me - present, past, or future. For an ancestor, a forebear who lives in me, in my cells. The wave of release and reconciliation creates space within us, and others feel that too and are reached by it – even those who were born from you or will be born from you. In this sense, something is healed in the entire family, the entire system, through you.

Sometimes I’m asked: can one do constellations for oneself? Not necessarily, since we are all highly skilled at self-deception. But tuning into what is unfolding – yes. And searching for, waiting for one’s own releasing sentence, here and now, in the given situation, when something disturbs us so deeply that change ripens within us. In other words: the main characteristic of a good constellation facilitator is the ability to be honest with oneself.

There are people who do not know what falling is. Even therapists. Either because someone always caught them, or because before the crisis even began, they already stepped away, moved on, rushed ahead. Without falling, however, I don’t know how capable one can be of truly comprehensive compassionate healing connection. Every facilitator can only take you as far as they themselves have gone. If they have only reached the pub at the corner of the street, that’s as far as they can take you. If only to the limits of materialism, then only that far. If only to cognitive behavioral therapy typical in local academic trainings, then only up to that. For example, spectacularly converted engineers often only change the outer form and carry their superstitions along. Instead of scientific superstitions – spiritual superstitions. Or vice versa. They do not have sensitivity for the soul; they learn the technique and apply it. Respect to the exceptions.

The core practice in constellations is inner silence. Inner silence as in the peace and undisturbed clarity of consciousness, of the soul. (The words consciousness and soul are references here, not definitions.) The inner space. Because only there can the healing sentence arrive clearly. If it arrives in noise, it will be disturbed, messy. Just as in outer life. There are countless personal and social “messages” on the street – but the noise is so great that they have nowhere to arrive. Like in the classic Zen parable of the overflowing cup.

Through the healing sentence, outer space and time expand just a tiny bit; in other words, enormous inner tectonic plates shift. Everything changes and nothing changes. Everything remains the same as before – and yet it doesn’t.

Some people heal by quitting smoking - others by lighting up a smoke. For some, meditation is their alcoholism, and others would be better off getting properly drunk instead of all that holiness, whether Chistian or Buddhist - if they truly want to grow and heal. Constellations are closer to Hesse’s glass bead game than to oldskul mainstream psychotherapy – which, ironically, ignores precisely the soul itself.

There is a disciple of Hellinger who, in a weekend workshop, lets hundred parallel constellations open from the field, an orgy of constellations – and at the other extreme, there is a student of Nelles who can work with a single person in a constellation: the client stands alone, sometimes they don’t even get up from the chair, and the release happens - only the connection between the facilitator and the client exists. “Everyone understands something different by family constellations.” – Wilfried Nelles

An infinitely blooming, thousand-colored soul-flower.

There is a certain level of soul-intimacy (I mean free outer and inner space) below which I not only find it difficult, but often not even feel it worthwhile to connect - which is why I rejoice in every single client of mine, for the depth and seriousness with which they honor me. This is no coincidence either. Everyone comes into this world for a reason. I came for this. To remind you of something you have forgotten. Again and again. In the most intimate emotional and soul connection possible. In this case, through constellations.

Everything flows, panta rhei, non-stop. The constellation is only a small extracted part of this big flow, an organic part of it. Our connection – between client and facilitator – is the starting point and the main axis to which we constantly return, while the group temporarily becomes a supportive soul-family. Something new always opens – that is life itself. The flower of life. A life-flower endlessly unfolding from itself into itself, constantly and infinitely flowing. An infinitely blooming, thousand-colored soul-flower.

Individual and group constellations, online and in person. 🙏 ✨ ❤️

(family constellations, CLIP couple’s integrations process, phenomenological and systemic constellations, LIP Life Integration Process)

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📧 Email: zsoltsuto around gmail com